I have been really busy this week and what happens in our house when mom gets busy is that the cooking becomes uneventful. Either we cop out and go to a restaurant (usually a fast food place that makes me sad to admit I feed my family there) or I make simple foods like spaghetti or hamburgers. The big problem with this, is I find myself brought down by the food. I never feel great when we eat out, especially greasy fast foods. I can barely stand to travel and not make something fresh (we try to stay places where we can cook). My body doesn't like that sort of cooking and eventually I start to feel sick.
I love things like spaghetti and my quick go-tos but it doesn't feed my soul like "real" cooking does. There's something wholesome in cutting up vegetables and spending time over the stove with rich smells and wonderful colors that gives me hope and joy. I had forgotten that until I read The Poetry of Food on a friend of mine's blog. I remembered that food is more than eating. It's creating and may be the missing part of my soul lately. I haven't slowed down to nourish my soul lately. I find that when I lack creativity outlets, my ability to function decreases. I don't enjoy life because I have forgotten how to. It seems like a strange thing to say - not cooking and creating makes me depressed. Today I have been wondering what is wrong with me. Why can't I care? I'm not unhappy but I can tell something is missing. All I have wanted to do this week is play on facebook. I have barely looked at recipes and crafting has been out of the question (haven't looked at any of my writing in far too many weeks). I have been blaming my blues on the weather and my family and the lack of time and .... but the real problem is I stopped feeding my soul. Sometimes I forget that reading doesn't really nourish my soul. I love reading and it inspires me but it's not creating. Sadly, all of this has affected my ability to blog (I have no recipes to share either).
My solution - I plan on doing some cooking this weekend. I have some frozen goat cheese and a couple recipes that I want to play with. Hopefully, I can force myself to make time for this through my somewhat busy weekend. I think there's always time to make cookies.